| |
| Peacock from Royal Palace Garden. Amazing, with ketchup. |
Unfortunately, he was out of town; he regularly hangs out and receives audiences from those requesting a meeting. I figured that we had lots in common to discuss and I was ready to give him a few pointers as to how best to rule his people. His loss. A relatively plain building, the palace contained relics from the several hundred years of the dynasty, which continues to today. There are items such as Victrolas, gem studded rifles, cocktail glass collections (complete with Sterling silver martini shaker), a 1961 black and white Phillips television and statues of the various kings and queens direct from Mme. Toussaud's. Eclectic does not begin to describe. One of the items holding a place of honour was a trophy, the kind one could buy in any sporting goods store, presented by the graduating class of some Canadian high school in honour of the 50th year of the previous king's reign.There was a hokiness but naive charm to the place.
What was most fascinating was the legend behind the unification of the kingdom in the 1500's. It seems that every local leader wanted to be the supreme chief. Too many Ashantis, not enough warriors; it's the same old story.They held a convention a la Romney, Bachman, McCain, et al. Rather than trying to prove who was the dumbest, the head priest collected toenail clippings and hair samples from the contestents, mixed them up and lit them sending the offering skyward. He then evoked a magical incantation and a golden stool (the kind you sit on, potty mouth) dropped from the sky and landed on the lap of 'he who was to be ordained'. I have seen pictures of this solid gold apparition and, based on size and weight, calculating velocity increase, whoever won this pageant and had the thing drop in his lap would have ended up looking like Toulouse-Lautrec. Maybe they didn't have physics in those days. Anyhow, they have soldiered on, each king acting as advisor and leader to his people, covered in enough gold to make any princess you've ever met (and I don't mean Ashanti) weep with envy. The stool embodies the soul of the people and remains hidden, interred somewhere in the kingdom. According to Ashanti lore, losing the stool would mean an end of the people. I was told that the king would be back in residence the next day. I put in my request for an audience, advising His Highness that I wanted to play a game of 'Hot and Cold'. He hasn't returned my call yet.
Kumasi is also home to the largest market in Central West Africa. Unfortunately part of it burned down the day before our arrival.

Why markets are needed is beyond me. Every square inch of every road houses a small stall, created from corrugated tin or a recycled shipping container. There exist oodles of products from electric cords to cooking utensils to jeans to phones available absolutely everywhere.
 |
| Kumasi's Cavendish Mall |
Tour completed for the day, we headed down to Lake Bosomtwe, named after an antelope that, avoiding a hunter, jumped into the lake and disappeared. Quite the honour for a drowned mammal. In fact, the lake had been created by a plummeting meteorite, to use scientific jargon - quite a while ago. The place was known as the Lake Bosomtwe Paradise Resort.
Should have known by the name we were headed for trouble. The road to Paradise was unpaved, deeply rutted, narrow, dusty, overgrown and steep. It was mentioned by Yao that the road to Paradise is never easy. Do not sin, it will not be worth the wear and tear on your spiritual 4x4.
Two other guests were there,

the other lodges remained empty. We ordered dinner and were advised it would be half an hour until served. Peckish but understanding, we waited. During this time the twenty or so staff who were employed to look after the 4 of us sat down for an impromptu dinner and drinking session. It started fine but we realized that the boisterous - heading toward rowdy - group were more interested in serving themselves than the guests. Hunger morphed into headache. A few of the staff, sensitive to my condition, did the only logical thing. They pulled a few large drums off the stage and began to jam. Had I been at Woodstock, I certainly would have enjoyed Santana's drummer, Michael Shreeve's, interpretation of
Soul Sacrifice but I was not ready to take in the vibe at the time. After some serious complaining and cajoling (by Lori, of course) we received our salad and sandwich, wolfed the meal down and headed back to our air conditioned room to find the air conditioner broken. Realizing that we were not at the Ritz, we accepted our fate and I sat down to work on the blog. Did you know that cratered lakes miles from civilization are not the most conducive spots to receive internet signals let alone WiFi? Now you do. So we curled up in this enormous bed in a slightly bug infested, under lit, warm, muggy room and went to sleep. On the bright side, the bathroom had hot water and decent pressure and one of the three TV channels broadcast Premier League football, so it wasn't a total write off.